


Seeking Knowledge

by locrianrose



Series: Seeking Knowledge Verse [1]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-24 20:47:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14961905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/locrianrose/pseuds/locrianrose
Summary: “If you think this armor is impressive, you should see me out of it.”An Exo Warlock and her interactions with the Vanguard Commander, and her attempts to strive for knowledge, no matter the cost. (And the obvious cost.)(Partially based off the above line of dialogue from Zavala in D1)





	1. Introductions

“If you think this armor is impressive, you should see me out of it.”

“Wha--” Callia froze, staring at the Commander, questions that she’d been pestering him with in regards to his armor immediately forgotten. 

Of all the things that she’d expected to hear, this was probably close to the very last she had expected. 

“Okay, I’m sorry, but what?” She stated, wishing that Nessa had been nearby to hear what she’d just heard and to back her up and tell her that she hadn’t misheard. 

“You heard what I said.”

Callia stared up for a moment longer, then she laughed. 

“Commander, no one ever told me that you made jokes! I always thought that was just Cayde! No one will believe me when I tell them you made one!”

“Ah-- Perhaps it might be best to not mention what I said--”

“Don’t worry!” Callia said. “I understand. I won’t say a word about it to anyone! We wouldn’t want knowledge of your sense of humor to spread!”

“Right.” The Commander nodded, and Callia laughed to herself again. If he wanted her to keep his secret, then she would, even if it didn’t seem the most important. 

“Now, as I was asking--” Callia continued with her earlier line of questioning that she’d stopped Zavala with, intent on gaining her answers. 

* * *

“Guardian, keep up with your fireteam.” Her ghost barked the order at her as she paused, examining the runes that’d been left behind by the hive after their ritual. She reached out a careful hand to touch one, shivering involuntarily at the absense of the light in the broken object. “Callia, stop! I will call Nessa if you don’t stop.”

“Ghost, it’s fine! I just want to look and see.”

“Callia, I swear, if you don’t stop I won’t just tell Nessa, I’ll tell--”

“Oh, don’t tell him.” Callia said in regards to her fireteam leader. “His ghost’ll throw a fit if he finds out, and we don’t need that happening.” 

“Callia, you coming?” Nessa spoke on the comms, checking back in with Callia. 

“I’m on my way! Just making sure everything was destroyed.” 

Impulsively, Callia reached out, exerting herself to break off a piece of the foreign material, breaking off the corner of the rune before stuffing it into a pouch on her belt.

“Callia!” Her ghost said, scandalized. “Don’t think that I won’t tell them!”

“I’m coming now, Nessa!” Callia replied, ignoring her ghost, running forwards to catch up with the rest of the fireteam. “Everything is destroyed here!”

“Good.” The fireteam leader replied. “Catch up quickly. I see acolytes.”

“On my way!” Callia ran ahead lightly, ready to assist her team, ignoring her ghosts muttering from inside her backpack. 

* * *

“Callia, now!” 

Callia darted out of cover, jumping up and into the air and letting the light that she’d accumulated internally ball up into her hands, charging up her Nova Bomb before projecting it out and against the ogre that had her fireteam pinned down. It gathered, and then flew towards the ogre, blasting it away. She slowly floated back down to the ground, the other fireteam members running out to finish the remaining hive off. 

As she landed, Callia reloaded her weapon, hanging back while her cohorts attacked. She fired into the thrall, attacking as she could and attempting to clear the space around the others to allow them to better fight. 

Finally, the remaining enemies defeated, they gathered back together, looking over the corpses of the hive. 

“We’re done here.” Their leader stated, looking over it all as he shouldered his bow, prepared to go. “Transmat back to orbit, and then we’ll report back to the tower.”

“Got it.” Nessa said, and Callia nodded.  

“Ghost, let’s go.” Callia said before her ghost could say anything to her teammates about the rune that she’d stowed. 

“Fine.” Her ghost replied irritably, obliging, and a moment later she was in her ship again, flipping switches and preparing for the journey back from Titan. 

Once she’d set her course, she reached for the pouch where she’d stashed the rune, carefully turning it over in her hands. 

“You shouldn’t have picked that up.”

“Ghost, if we don’t study our enemies, then how will we know how to stop them?” Callia asked, scratching at the material to see if it’d rub off. “Besides. I don’t see how this could harm me.”

“Oh, you don’t see how it could harm you! Guardian, need I remind you of the damage that  the hive have done before? Do I need to tell you what’s been done before by the hive to Guardians they’ve fought? Have you not heard of Dredgen Yor?”

“Ghost, I do what I want.” Callia stated firmly. “And I want to study this, and that’s what I plan to do.”

“What if I tell?”

“And then what, they’ll cast me out? Make us leave the tower? Ghost, I think you need to consider what the consequences of such an action.”

“They wouldn’t do that.” Her ghost grumbled, but still, he seemed more reluctant as he spoke again. “I’m not helping you. That’s that, and it’s all I’m going to say.”

“Fine. I can do my research without your help, if it comes to that.” Callia said, tucking the rune away again.

“You’ll have to.” Her ghost retorted. 

* * *

“Guardian, ah-- I would speak with you, if possible.”

Callia looked over to see the Commander approaching as purposefully as he could, ignoring the glances from those around him. 

“Of course!” Callia replied, staring at him and trying not to let her hand stray to the pouch that she knew held the hive rune. 

“Good. If you wouldn’t mind walking with me.”

Callia nodded, following him as he walked, slowly moving into a more private area of the tower, focusing all her energy on keeping her hand from the rune. 

“Guardian-- Callia, if I may--” Callia nodded “--Callia. What  I said the other day was wildly inappropriate, and I merely wanted to apologize.”

Callia thought for a moment before remembering what he was speaking of. 

“Wait-- You weren’t joking?”

“I-- Ah. I had thought that there might be interest there, and I wanted to communicate my willingness.”

Callia didn’t say anything for a long moment, thinking about her options and trying to discern what she felt. 

“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested.” She began slowly, but then her hand drifted towards the rune again. “But I feel. I feel that anything between us wouldn’t end well. My priority is defending the tower, and doing whatever it takes to do that.”

“And I want nothing more than that.” Zavala replied. “The protection of the city would always have to come first, and--”

This wasn’t what Callia had wanted to discuss, or a chain of events that she’d ever debated or even considered. Zavala was part of the vanguard, a rank above them all. This didn’t make sense, and the rune, the rune was calling her name, and while she’d be a fool to deny that she was attracted to Zavala, the rune was what was more important than anything else. She needed to know what it meant, but this-- 

\--There was time for this. 

Callia stepped towards the Vanguard Commander, standing on her toes to reach, pressing her metallic lips to his warm ones. He pressed an arm to her back, holding her there for a moment before she broke away, inhaling deeply. 

“I don’t think this is a good idea.” She said, looking in his eyes. 

“In our position, I think that we have to take these things as they come. After Ghaul came--” Zavala paused. “--After that I think it’s important to take chances on what we have.”

Callia lingered for a moment longer, then broke away. 

“I need to check in with my fireteam.” She said, taking a few steps back. “But. We should take time. If you’re really sure.”

“Guardian, I am.”

* * *

Callia quickly made her way back to her bunk, purposefully avoiding her fireteam members and their known haunts as she went. There was a chance that they’d know that she was hiding something, be it her recent encounter with Zavala or the hive rune she’d hidden away. 

She managed to make it back without any encounters of that sort, and once she found herself there she locked the door behind her, her ghost popping out disapprovingly to watch as she extracted the rune. 

“Ghost, will you keep watch?”

“I already said that I’m not helping you with this.”

“So you want me to get caught?”

“Hmph. Fine. I’ll warn you if anyone is coming, but that’s all that I’ll do.”

Callia placed a hand on the rune, breathing deeply as she did, attempting to reach out with the light in her to try to feel what she could. As she did, she froze-- there was no light in the scrap. There was nothing there. It was simply an absence of light, and nothing there. Callia recoiled, pulling her hand back. 

“Guardian?” Callia’s ghost bobbed towards her, uncertainty shifting. 

“It’s fine.” Callia said, reaching under her cot to pull out a scrap of scribbled notes. Carefully, she recorded the sign, detailing it carefully. This was something? A start, perhaps, of understanding what they were fighting against and understanding what was happening. Perhaps there was a way to record or remember what she saw when they were sent out on missions, and to begin to catalogue what she saw and what was happening, and from there, to learn. 

* * *

Callia huddled over her notes, a blanket draped uselessly over her shoulders, armor lying in a pile in the corner of the room. The blanket wasn’t necessary, but  it did provide some degree of comfort as she studied the runes that she’d collected thus far since she’d first begun searching for them. There was something about looking at them that infused her with a deep chill, so the blanket stayed. 

One welcome source of warmth had been the still somewhat unexpected interactions with Zavala, stolen away and hidden from prying eyes. Both of them seemed to have decided that this was something that they wanted, and so things had gone well.

Her ghost was absent, just as he had been more and more recently. It both quieter and lonelier without him, and Callia had found herself confining herself to her room more and more often, studying the runes and her notes to see what she could find. 

There didn’t seem to be any correlation thus far, but it hadn’t stopped her from looking. Ghost refused to talk with her about it, and so she’d been left to study it alone. 

A knock on her door interrupted her thoughts, so she stuffed her papers under her pillow. 

“Ghost?” She asked. 

There was no response, so she sighed, standing. She looked back once, making sure that her papers were hidden, then moved, pushing the button to open the door.

Zavala was there, stiff and awkward. He met her gaze.

Callia straightened, letting the blanket fall from her shoulders.

“Commander.”

“Guardian,” he began, voice emotionless, “May I enter?”

Callia nodded, stepping aside. 

“Yes.” She kept her voice as cool as his, allowing him to enter. 

The door closed behind him, Callia waiting for the other to speak. 

“Callia.” He spoke again, before reaching out to bring her into his arms. The door closed and the outside world sealed away, Callia welcomed the embrace, leaning into it and the warmth that he brought. Even with him here, the coldness in her core still remained, chilling her.

She needed to push that away while he was here. That didn’t matter now, and with her ghost gone more and more, this companionship was what she had outside of her interactions with her fireteam. 

“Zavala.” She said, allowing herself to be pressed to his chest, spreading her own arms to embrace him tightly. 

“I wanted to see you.” He said, not moving.

“Is everything fine?” Callia asked, voice slightly muffled by his armor. 

“No. There have been-- Rumors-- On Mars. I will be leaving.”

“I understand.” Callia said. It would be lonely without their stolen moments, but Callia would take what she could. Perhaps she’d accept some of her fireteam’s invitations to do something outside of their missions, or perhaps she’d just work more with the runes she knew, attempting to ascertain their meaning.

“I will miss you.”

Callia thought for a moment, pushing away and up onto her toes to kiss him gently. 

“I’ll miss you too.”

“When I return, I will send a message to your ghost.”

Callia faltered at that, but nodded quickly. 

“You should talk to your ghost.” Zavala said quietly, leaning down to kiss Callia gently. 

Callia tensed at that mention. 

“I’ll think about it.”

“Your ghost is your first partner, and the one that matters the most.”

“Are you speaking as the Commander or as--” Callia broke off, unsure as to what word to use. 

“Both.” He nodded to her. “I want you to stay safe, and keeping your ghost close is part of that.”

Callia didn’t respond to that, holding him close again. His warmth was welcome, and something that she’d be losing soon for a time.

“Come back safe.” She finally said, voice quieter than usual. “Please. You’re important to me.”

“Callia.” He said her name gently. “I will do my best.”

* * *

Callia was distracted when her ghost finally reappeared, still fruitlessly studying the runes. 

“Your fireteam would like you to report to the hangar tomorrow. You’re being sent to deal with the  _ hive _ on Titan again.” It twitched irritably. 

Callia shrugged. “I’ll be there.”

“Then I’ll see you then.” Her ghost said, disappearing with a shiver of irritation.

* * *

Callia fired her hand cannon at the approaching thrall, watching as the rest of her fireteam members fired and fought, taking down the hive as they moved deeper into the arcology on Titan. Other fireteams had fought and died here, and they’d been warned to retreat at the sight of a larger ritual that could bring permanent deaths like those that had happened to Takeo-3 and the other fireteams that had died to create void crystals. 

This should be a routine scan, a quick pass over to make sure that the hive hadn’t reorganized into something that could do what had been done before. Callia was eager to be there, despite the silence from her ghost as they worked in concert. 

As they cleared the room, Callia hung back under the guise of clearing out what remained of the hive as she typically did, approaching a dead knight, looking to its shield for anything that she could take or learn. 

“I’m going ahead.” Her ghost sniffed at her as he watched her approach the knight. “I sense no hive in the area.”

She stepped forwards, moving one foot forwards. The ground shifted under her foot, just as disconcertingly soft as it always was in the deeper tunnels of the arcology, so she didn’t think twice as she continued. 

As she moved her other foot forwards, a disconcerting squelch was the only thing she heard or felt before ground fell out from beneath her, sending her plummeting down into the darkness below.

* * *

Callia fell into the darkness, hand cannon gripped frantically in her hand as she did, an involuntary scream slipping out of her lips as she fell for what felt like too long, slamming into the soggy ground below. Something snapped, and she floundered on the ground, unable to move. The darkness was present here, pressing down on her and all present, spreading a chill through the parts of her that could still feel after the fall. 

It was a moment before she could manage to force herself to call out. 

“...Ghost--” Her voice was far quieter than she could have hoped, and she tightly gripped the hand cannon that she still held by some miracle, refusing to let it go. “--Ghost!” 

She tried to call out again, attempting to spot anything above her, hoping to see the light of her ghost following her down, but all she saw was the eerily glowing walls of the hive. 

Suddenly, a chilling scream sounded somewhere in the room. Callia fired off her hand cannon in the direction of the shot, attempting to hit something-- anything-- because what she was hearing sounded painfully like a Wizard, and she was in no shape to deal with one currently. 

Her hands were shaking, and she couldn’t seem to aim as she fired again, shots still going wild as the Wizard appeared, coming into view as it danced closer, the darkness pulsating out from it, pelting down towards her as it came, striking her down and pressing her down. 

Callia could feel her light fading as it pelted down, dragging her further and further underneath, but then, just before she completely went under, she heard it-- haunting and faint, a dissonant melody that came with the encroaching darkness, silencing her light. 

 

 

  
  
  



	2. Journey

_ “Callia– Callia! What have I done– Callia, I’ll be back, I swear. I won’t leave you again.” _

_ The ghost dodged the Wizard, zooming back up towards the place where the ceiling above had fallen in, flying back towards the rest of the fireteam.  _

_ “Callia fell! Callia’s fallen, and I tried to revive her– I tried! There’s a Wizard, and I can’t revive her!” _

_ “What– Show where.” The leader of the fireteam ordered to the ghost.  _

_ The ghost zipped towards where the ground had fallen in, the other members of the fireteam rushing after, stopping just short of the hole in the ground.  _

_ “I’m going in.” The hunter stated, and jumped down without another word to the Titan. She jumped once, twice, then a third time, landing down below.  _

_ After a moment of hesitation, the Titan followed, jumping down to fire at the Wizard that still floated down below, darkness still raining down on the dead Warlock below.  _

_ Together the two made quick work of the Wizard, clearing a space, lending their ghosts to assist the lone ghost in reviving its partner, and then– _

Callia revived, the icy sensation of returning to life coursing through her as she did. She sat up abruptly, gasping for air, seeing her fireteam surrounding her, Nessa offering her a hand. Callia took it, standing slowly. 

“What happened?”

“I fell.” Callia said. 

“How?”

“I don’t know– The ground was weak, something was wrong.” Callia forced the words out. 

“From now on, we’re sticking together.” Their leader ordered, looking pointedly to Callia. “We’ll destroy what’s left behind together.”

This was less than ideal, and not just because they were now somewhere down below where they should be, and the fact that they’d need to find a way out. 

“Sloane,” Nessa began, speaking over comms. “We’ve fallen down below the Arcology. We’re working on finding a way out, but we may need help.”

Callia’s ghost was floating close by, seemingly afraid to leave her now. Callia was sure that she’d be getting some harsh words from it later, but at least for now, with her fireteam here, she’d escape any such scolding. 

“Fireteam, we don’t want any accidents. Work on getting out, and if anyone else lands, we’ll send them in as backup.”

“Right. We’ll get on that.” Nessa replied back. 

Their leader looked reluctant to turn back on their quest, but after a moment of debate, he nodded. 

“We’ll do it. Let’s get out of here.”

* * *

Callia paced the tight space of her room, walking between the door and the wall beside her cot, repeating the path over and over. She needed to find out more, and she needed to know what she’d heard in the moments before she’d died, and why that death had been different than all the others before. 

Her ghost watched from where he floated above her cot, bobbing slightly as she moved back and forth. 

“Callia–” He finally said. “– We need to talk about what happened.”

“I’m not stopping.” Callia said. “I need to look for more.”

“Your fireteam isn’t going to let you wander off alone again.”

“Ghost, the tower needs to research this. I want to! I can’t just let it be unknown. This is something that I need to know.” Callia insisted. 

“You know about Dredgen Yor. I told you about Osiris. What makes you think you’d be any different than them?”

Callia paused, looking to her ghost, trying to decide if she cared about what he was saying or not, if it mattered to her. 

There was no reason to think that she’d be smarter or better than guardians who came before, let alone heroes like Osiris had been. She was just a warlock, and a newer one at that. True, she’d pestered her way to a point where the Vanguard and vendors knew who she was through her questioning alone, but that didn’t mean that she was any better or wiser than her peers. 

Then there was the song, the dissonant notes that she’d heard before she’d died. Perhaps it was from the runes she’d studied, or perhaps something had been different about the Wizard that her teammates had presumably killed. 

“Ghost,” Callia finally said, slowing in her pacing, “I don’t think I’m any better than them. I just don’t know if I care.”

“Callia! Don’t be stupid. You  _ know _ that doing this won’t end well.”

“I–I don’t think that I care.” She said, wondering at her own words, realizing the truth in them even as she spoke. “If I’m not strong enough to follow my research then that’s no ones fault but my own.”

“Callia Vale, don’t you _dare_ _say that!_ ” Her ghost said, scandalized. “First of all, it’s stupid. Second of all, that’s not how things work! Just because you aren’t strong enough doesn’t mean that we should just do away with you!”

Callia didn’t reply, resuming her pacing. 

“Don’t ignore me now! Callia, I swear. I will tell your fireteam.”

“I’m leaving.”

“What?” 

“Did you hear me, Ghost? I’m leaving. I’m going to find out what I can, and I don’t plan to stop for anything.”

“Callia– What about your fireteam? What about–What about the Commander?” Her ghost stuttered, staring. 

Callia paused in her pacing, staring at the notes that were splayed across her cot. 

Zavala had provided a warmth that she couldn’t deny in her life, but even that– there had been something, a coldness that even he couldn’t push away, and that she certainly had no idea how to stop. 

“Ghost. I’m going to find the Hive. I need to hear what I heard again, and this time I’ll be prepared.”

“What you heard–Callia, what did you hear?”

“Something, Ghost, and I have to know what it was.” Callia turned to her Ghost, desperate. “I need to know.”

“If you leave, I’m going with you.”

“Thank you.” Callia said, looking to her ghost. 

“I don’t agree with what you’re doing.” Her ghost clarified. “But after what happened on Titan– I’m not leaving you alone. I just need you to know that if you get into another situation like that, I won’t be able to revive you. In places like that, where the darkness is too strong, I might not be able to keep you safe.”

“Then we’ll just have to be smart.”Callia said, straightening her notes before reaching for her armor. “We need to go now– and we can start here, on earth, and we’ll see what we can find.”

“What are you going to tell your fireteam?”

“Nothing.” Callia said after a moment. “They don’t need to know where I am, and if they do–there’s a chance that they’ll follow.”

“I don’t–” Her ghost began, breaking off. “Fine. And the Commander?”

Callia slumped. “I… The same. He doesn’t need to know where I went.”

“And he’d probably disagree with what you’re doing.” Ghost added. “We both know that.”

“Right.” Callia began to put on her armor, strapping on her robes. “We’ll say that we’re heading out on a solo patrol, and we’ll be gone before they know where we went.”

“Fine. Make sure that you pack everything you need.”

“Other than making sure I’ve got ammunition, what else do I need? Food is a luxury that I don’t need.”

“You’re right.” Her ghost said. 

“Actually, why don’t I just take a patrol where I want to go?” Callia asked. “It’ll give me a reason to be there, and I won’t have to worry about anyone following.”

“...That… would work.” Her Ghost said. “And then they won’t know until it’s too late. 

“And so I’ll go.” Callia said, folding up her papers and tucking them into an inside pocket. She turned, giving her small room a cursory glance, then turned, leaving, the door shutting behind her.

* * *

Callia could tell that her nova bomb was charged and ready to go, so she moved out of cover, hurling it into the crowd of thrall that were milling ahead of her. It hit, eliminating them and allowing her to move forwards to the next spot of cover. There, ahead, lurking in the cave that she’d been slowly descending into was a wizard. As she darted out and into the next spot of cover it spotted her, sending it’s darkness pelting down towards her with a shriek. 

She pulled her sniper from her back, carefully aiming it towards the wizard, firing off a shot, undoubtedly weakening it, but as she poked out to shoot, it sent the bolts of darkness towards her, a few managing to catch her before she ducked back into cover.

“Careful!” Her ghost hissed at her as she ducked back down into cover, waiting for her ghost to heal her completely before she popped back out of cover, getting off another shot against the Wizard, watching as it fell to the ground, silence falling in the cavern.

Callia had been tracking this particular Wizard for nearly a week, watching and waiting until she’d felt that it was safe to go into the cave. She’d worked through the hive here slowly and carefully.

She’d been ignoring the worried messages from her fireteam in the months since leaving, and eventually the one from Cayde-6, asking why she’d never returned from one of his patrols, requesting confirmation or denial if she was alive. 

There had been messages from Zavala as well-- messages that she’d left unread, choosing to avoid the pain that listening to them would undoubtedly bring.

They wouldn’t find her here, though, as she was far from where she’d first started, all of her searching before she’d come here culminating in this. 

Giving the room a quick glance, Callia nodded to her ghost, swinging her sniper rifle back onto her back. 

“See anything, Ghost?”

“Not nearby. My sensors don’t see any hive.”

“Good.” Callia said, jogging over towards the place where the wizard had fallen, scanning the ground for anything remaining. “We’ll see what we can learn from the rituals here, then we’ll destroy what’s left.”

“It looks similar to what we’ve seen on Titan.” Her ghost said. “The rituals there.”

“I’ll record what I can.” Callia said, reaching in and extracting the wrinkled sheet of paper that held her notes. She’d digitized them on a datapad back with her ship, but this copy worked well for temporary notes. 

She began by recording a rough sketch of the shape of the lines on the ground, jotting down what remained of the lines before folding the paper again, tucking it away once more before drawing her hand cannon, firing it repeatedly into the marks of the ritual till they were obscured, the light in them fading slowly. 

“Where do you plan to go next?” Her ghost asked as she stepped away, slowly beginning the climb back out of the caves. 

“I’ve been thinking about going to--” Callia broke off, pressing a finger to her helmet. She ducked towards cover, ghost bobbing after her. 

“Do you hear that?” She asked, voice barely a breath. 

“What?” Her ghost replied. “I didn’t hear anything.” 

“I swear I heard something.” She replied, listening intently. There was nothing and– there it was, something whispering further into the cave, something down in the depths– undoubtedly some hive hidden away deep below, lurking and planning. 

“Ghost, I’m going farther in.”

“What? No!”

Callia moved out of cover, moving towards the source of the whispers. 

“Ghost, c’mon!” She gestured, and the little robot followed reluctantly, muttering to itself as it went farther into the cave. 

“Callia, this doesn’t feel right.” The ghost hissed to her, following closely. 

“None of this ever feels right.” Callia retorted. “I haven’t felt warm in months. But this-- if there are more here, there could be something going on here, and if there’s something big then we need to stop it or find a way to report it.”

“So now you’re trying to help the tower!”

“I’m just trying to explain why we need to go farther in.” Callia said. “If it makes you feel better we both know that there’s been far too many hive in this area for nothing to be happening, and we’re both aware that we’re the only team here for miles.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better!”

“Fine. I’m still going in. Stay quiet, I’m trying to hear what’s happening farther in.”

“Hmph.” Still, her ghost obliged, following closely behind her as she went. 

Callia would have sworn that the whispering that she could hear was coming from farther in, but as she crept farther in, she saw nothing, the whispering still persisting. 

“Callia, please. I can send an anonymous tip to the tower, and they can send more guardians.”

“...Just a little farther in. If I don’t see anything, then we can leave.”

Her ghost didn’t reply to that, so Callia continued farther in, assuming that her ghost would follow. There was something there, in the darkness, and Callia would have swore that she could hear it, whispering to her as she moved, calling out to her in the oppressive darkness below. 

She could almost hear it now, the song that she’d been chasing for months now, and so when her Ghost urged her to stop, she pushed inwards, moving into worm lined halls, the whispers still remaining just as frustratingly silent as they had first been when she caught wind of them and then--

A shriek echoed across the inexplicably lit cavern that she’d entered into, silencing the whispers.

The darkness was thick here, oppressive and all consuming, yawning and hungry for her light. Callia could feel the chill of it, so different from the clear light of the traveler, as it gnawed at her, attempting to pull away the light she’d brought down with her. Her connection to the traveler was there, but tenuous and faint, and as she stopped, hearing a rumbling from below, she saw her ghost shiver, floating at her side. 

“Ghost-- What did we find?” She asked. 

“Callia,  _ please. _ Listen to me.”

Callia took a step forwards as the first of the thrall charged out and towards her, their shrieking drowning out any hope of hearing the whispers. She drew her hand cannon, firing it into them. 

“Callia, we need to leave, now. You can’t possibly fight all of them.”

“Ghost, I need to know.”

Acolytes moved from the shadows, a Wizard moving into view.

“Callia, listen now!”

There it was again-- in the gaps between the shrieking, Callia could hear the whispers, still maddeningly present. 

“Ghost, I can hear them!” Callia called out, hand cannon falling from her grasp. 

“Callia, no! C’mon, snap out of it, now!” The Ghost bobbed by her hand for a moment, then jerked away as the trall reached her, pulling the exo down as the Wizard edged closer. “Callia! I need you to listen to me! I can’t revive you here!”

Her ghost was forced to bob away as the hive approached, forcing Callia down.

“Callia--Oh, why do you have to do this! I’ll be back for you, I swear.”

The ghost zipped away as the Wizard reached Callia, darkness falling for the guardian as her ghost fled, trying to find a place to hide or to reach the surface before the hive could reach him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is honestly pretty self indulgent? But really, it's the funnest time I've had writing in ages so I'll take it. Pls lemme know if you spot grammar/spelling errors.


	3. Loss

Callia couldn’t find it in herself to move as she watched the tiny light of her ghost bob away, the thrall piling over her, holding her down and unable to find it in herself to fight.

The wizard approached, and Callia waited, listening for the whispers of the darkness in the spaces between the noises and shrieks of the thrall.

“ _ This is the ghost of Callia Vale, Warlock, requesting assistance on earth, coordinates… _ ” A transmission buzzed over her comms, reaching out to whoever might hear. “ _... An unknown number of hive swarmed my Guardian underground, and I wasn’t able to revive her. It seemed like there was some sort of ritual taking place _ .”

Silence was the only response over comms, and Callia could only watch as the Wizard floated before her, reaching forward to snatch away her light, placing a slimy hand on her metalic throat, crushing the metal under its grasp.

“ _ This is the ghost of Callia Vale, Warlock… _ ” 

_ “Woah there, bud– I’m barely picking this up. I’m gonna need you to stay online until we can boost this up to a point where we can figure out where you are. You said you’re Callia’s ghost?” _

_ “Transmitting coordinates!” _

_ “Don’t know if we’ll be able to pick them up, so just keep talking to us. Where’s your Guardian?” _

_ “I can’t see her– I can’t see her!” _

_ “Bud, c’mon. Stay with me. If you don’t stay alive, you can’t help her. I need you to get to the surface so we can get your signal–” _

_ Ghost spat out the coordinates, listing off the coordinates that the entrance to the cave had been found at. “Go here, and then go down!” _

_ “Are you safe?” _

_ “No! I told you, there’s hive here!” _

_ “Okay, okay, just keep talking. Listen, you gotta get out of there or get where the hive can’t reach you. We’ve just about got a lock on the general area of your location, and I’m sending out a message to any available fireteams in the area aaand it looks like we’re lucky. There should be a couple of Titans a few hours away.” _

_ “They need to hurry!  _

_ “Look. I’m gonna send you a private channel, and I want you to keep talking on that one. We don’t want the Fallen picking up on this, so I need you to swap to that.”  _

_ “Done, I’ll swap, but please, tell them to hurry.” _

_ “Hey, don’t worry. Just stay alive, and focus on staying away from the hive.”  _

_ “I’m trying– No–NO! CALLIA!” _

_ “Hey, Hey, I need you to stay online! Get out of there. Don’t try to stay and watch for now. The best thing that you can do to help her is stay alive, you hear me? Stay alive!” _

_ “I can’t leave her–” _

_ “Yes you can. That’s an order, Ghost.” _

_ “...Fine! Retreating. I’ll be waiting outside–” _

_ “Good. I’ll see if I can send some extra firepower your way. I think I know someone who might be interested in Ms. Vale’s wearabouts.” _ _   
_

* * *

_ Ghost bobbed nervously in the air, hidden behind the thick leaves of the tree that still stood, watching tensely as he waited for any sign of the promised Guardians. He’d been waiting now for far longer than the would have wanted, but Cayde had checked in recently to reassure him that help would be there within the hour, and so he waited impatiently. There was no sense of his connection with Callia, and he desperately hoped that he’d be able to find her again below, and that he wouldn’t be too late to revive her. _

_ Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the glimmer of a transmat shone in the nearby clearing, as the promised Fireteam arrived. Ghost had a sneaking suspicion of just who the extra firepower would be, but he wasn’t going to wait outside for him. Right now his priority was reaching Callia, and anything else was secondary and unimportant.  _

_ “Guardians!” The Ghost spoke, noting that, as Cayde had mentioned, they were all titans. “Over here, and hurry.”  _

_ The titans made their way towards him, quickly approaching the cave.  _

_ “She’s down there.” The Ghost said, edging towards it. “We cleared the first bit in, but there were more hive farther down– I don’t know how many.” _

_ “Relax.” One of the titans spoke, stepping to the front. “We’ll get down there, and we’ll take care of them. What are we going up against?”   _

_ Ghost bobbed erratically as he spoke. “There’s a Wizard for sure, and lots of thrall– There might have been a ritual, because Callia– She wasn’t right before we ran into them.” _

_ “Noted. Okay. We’ll go as quickly as we can, but we’re not going to risk anything.” _

_ “Please hurry.” The Ghost said, bobbing up and down. “I promised I wouldn’t leave her again.” _

_ “Don’t worry. We’ll clear out the hive, and you’ll be able to revive her. It’ll be fine.” _

_ “Just– Please.” _

_ “Lead the way.”  _

_ They began their slow descent into the cave below, progressing past the entrance. _

_ “How far in were the hive?” The lead titan asked.  _

_ “Pretty far. It took us a long time to get as far as we did.” The ghost replied.  _

_ “Just warn us when we get closer.” _

_ “I will.” The Ghost bobbed nervously, zipping back and forth between the titans and where he was leading them. “I’ll tell you once we get closer.” _

* * *

_ “This is the place where things went wrong.” The ghost spoke in the silence. “We killed a wizard– there was some sort of ritual here, and Callia–” He paused, attempting to decide what to say. “Callia must have stepped in something, or failed to destroy it. She said she heard whispers, farther in.” _

_ “I don’t hear anything.” One of the titans said. “Any of you?” _

_ The others shook their heads.  _

_ “If anyone hears anything, speak up.” Their leader said. “If not, we press on.” _

_ Ghost bobbed impatiently up and down. They were so close now, very nearly there, and he knew that Callia had to be close.  _

_ “We’re almost there.” He finally said. “In the next cavern, up ahead.” _

_ “Then let’s deal with this.” The first titan said, conjuring up a fiery hammer before charging into the room ahead, the shrieks of the thralls within rising up as a reaction to his actions.  _

_ Ghost followed, the other two titans following their compatriot, one firing a submachine gun, the other a scout rifle.  _

_ The Ghost scanned the room for Callia, floating up near the upper areas of the cavern, attempting to see where she was– and there, the wizard floating away from her in the face of the new titans, she lay, currently dead, wires pulled out and sparking. He didn’t miss the unmistakable white of the piece of paper that she’d been recording the runes on, laying to the side of her, and with a sickening jolt he realised that if the titans saw that– or worse, if their reinforcement did, Callia would be in more trouble than they’d ever been in before.  _

_ The titans seemed evenly matched with the hive in the cavern, pushing them back towards the far side of the cavern, until finally–  _

_ “Hey Ghost! Now!” One of the Titans was standing by Callia, his own ghost at his side.  _

_ “Can you revive if she helps?” The Titan gestured towards his ghost.  _

_ “I can! I can revive her!” The Ghost surged towards Callia, moving towards her and taking the shared light from the other ghost to push it to Callia, the traveler’s energy knitting bent metal back into shape. Callia’s optics slowly flickered back on, and as they did, ghost was disheartened to see that she was just as dazed as she had been before she’d died, still looking across the room, searching for something that the rest of them couldn’t see.  _

_ “Callia?” _

_ “Ghost– They’re the ones whispering.” She said, voice barely audible.  _

_ “You’ve got this?” The titan asked.  _

_ “I’ll watch her.” Ghost replied.  _

_ “Good. If you can get her to start heading out, do it. There’s more coming up from above, and I’m not sure how long we can hold them off.” _

_ “I’ll try.” Ghost replied.  _

_ “Callia, I need you to listen to me.” Ghost said to her. “Callia, please. I’m sorry I left.” _

_ A shot echoed off from the far side of the room, and then–  _

Callia slowly turned at the sound of the shot, clutching her paper in one hand, looking to the furious figure that had just charged into the cave, heart sinking as she saw the Vanguard Commander enter the cave, weapon drawn, charging into the fight with the titans.

“Get her out of here if she can’t fight!” Was his order to her ghost, who bobbed in response.  

“Ghost–” Callia said, voice weak. “–We need to leave. They’re whispering to me. I can’t let him see this–”

She looked to the paper, slowly stumbling to her feet, clutching it tightly. 

“Callia–  _ Please. _ ”

“Ghost, I can’t stop now. Not with what I know–”

“Callia– _No._ _This is it. I’m not letting you run from this again.”_ Ghost bobbed away, making a split second decision. “Zavala!” He called. “Need you over here, now!”

“Ghost, don’t you dare–” Callia said, taking a step away before stumbling again, tumbling to the ground. “Ghost, I can hear them!”

“Guardian–” Zavala ran to them. “–Callia–” He said her name, voice hushed as he did. “Callia–“ He broke off again.

“Commander! She needs to get out of here.”

“Yes.” Zavala nodded, lifting Callia in his arms. “Titans!” He called to the others, all working to press the swarm of hive back. “Follow us out! Keep the Hive at bay!”

Callia clung to her battered paper, clutching it tightly in her hands, still just as dazed as she’d been when she’d been revived moments before, at the very least partially unaware of the situation. 

Zavala charged ahead, Callia’s ghost shining his light, the titans behind them slowly allowing the hive to push them back.

“Callia, please.” Zavala said. “Can you hear me?”

“I–” Callia’s optics flickered. “The hive is too close.”

“Titans!” Zavala called back. “When we reach the exit, transmat out. I’ll get her back to the city.”

Callia could still hear the whispering, but as they grew farther away from the hive, it slowed, the silence between the shrieks fading into actual silence, until they reached the outside of the cave, and, as the paper slipped from her grasp, they disappeared entirely. 

“Ghost–” She said, slowly moving to sit up– “Oh–” She looked to Zavala, instantly shrinking back down. 

“Guardian.” Zavala leapt, making the last jump up and out of the cave, Callia latching on as she became more aware of the situation. 

“My notes?” Callia said, looking back into the cave. “Ghost! My notes!” 

As Zavala exited the cave, Callia struggled to free herself from his arms, staggering away and to her feet.

“I need to go back in!” She declared, taking a few steps back towards the cave. Zavala caught her arm, tugging her away. 

“Callia, you can’t go back in there alone!”

“I need that paper!”

“What are you doing?” Zavala said sharply, and Callia froze, turning slowly to face him. 

“I’ll get it.” One of the Titans said. “The hive didn’t follow us to the exit, and it shouldn’t be too tricky to grab.”

“No.” Callia’s ghost spoke out. “Don’t go get it.”

Callia glared at her ghost. The Titan waited, looking to Zavala. 

“Guardian, what is on that paper?”

“Hive things.” Her ghost replied before she could. “She’s been tracking them, and I think– I think that’s what went wrong.”

“Ghost!” Callia glared at him. 

“You what?” Zavala asked sharply, releasing Callia’s arm. “Do you not understand the danger of such things?”

Callia grumbled to herself, refusing to meet his gaze. 

“Titan.” Zavala said. “Return and burn it if you find it. Guardian, you will be returning to the city, and there you will tell Ikora what you’ve done, and she  _ will  _ judge you for what you’ve done. I am not your leader.”

“I’m not going back.” Callia declared, firmly crossing her arms. 

“Callia, please.” Her ghost said, bobbing closer. “Don’t make us leave again.”

“I didn’t force you to go with me.”

“And where would you have been without your ghost, Guardian? What would you have done?”

Callia didn’t meet Zavala’s eyes as he spoke, looking to her ghost instead. If she’d gone without her ghost, at this moment she truly would have been dead, with no hope of returning. She would be dead, her light snuffed out by the hive. 

“Commander, will you be needing us?” One of the remaining two titans asked. 

“No. I will escort this Warlock back to the city and to Ikora Rey. Go assist your teammate in making sure that any remaining notes are burned, then report when that is done.”

“Yessir.” The Titan nodded, both of them entering back into the cave. 

Callia waited tensely for Zavala to make a move, still not meeting his eyes. 

“Callia.” He finally spoke her name. “What have you done?”

“I studied what the hive left behind.”

“But why? I never took you for a fool. You know the cost of such studies.”

Callia faltered, meeting his eyes for a fraction of a moment.

“I needed to know. Ever since I woke– I just wanted to understand, to know what they were.”

“And you couldn’t discover that in the tower?”

Callia faltered as she tried to explain why she’d wanted to study the hive, still refusing to meet Zavala’s gaze.

“Studying the hive like that should not be done.” Zavala said. 

“But what if we were able to study them, and to know what we were getting into before we went? There wouldn’t be any more Taeko-3s.”

“Callia, if we align ourselves with the darkness then we are no better than it.” Zavala stated. “Don’t be a fool.”

Callia didn’t respond for a long moment, looking to Zavala only when he stepped forwards, slowly and cautiously taking her hands in his, speaking urgently.

“Callia, I have seen other guardians fall to the darkness. I’ve seen them become monsters and I have seen them break. I have-- no desire to see that happen to you. Please, come back. I can’t say that it’ll be easy, but please, do what is right.”

“Also, you’re being selfish.” Callia’s ghost added. “There are people who care about you that _ you _ are hurting. Look at me. And your fireteam. And the Commander.”

“Your fireteam searched for you.” Zavala said. “They looked, and when they thought you were dead--”

“--I’ll come back.” Callia interjected, meeting Zavala’s eyes for a moment before looking back down. “I’ll come back and I’ll tell Ikora what I’ve done.”

“There will be consequences.”

“My ghost is right.” Callia stated slowly. “I think that what I did-- what I did was selfish. I didn’t think about anyone else when I acted, and that was wrong. It definitely wasn’t fair to you, Ghost.”

“Finally! Now you’ll admit that you’re wrong.”

“And my leaving wasn’t fair to you.” She looked up to Zavala. “I think I was wrong? I still think what I think about the hive--but what I did wasn’t fair.”

“Can I trust you to return on your own?” Zavala asked. 

“Oh, I’ll make sure she does.” Her ghost interjected. “There’s no way I’m doing this again.”

“I’ll go back.” Callia said. “I’ll come home.”


	4. Reunited

“Callia!” Nessa called, running to her, wrapping her arms around her in a tight hug. “We thought you were dead!”

“Nessa!” Callia hugged the other tightly, releasing her after a moment. “Where’s--”

“He’ll come around.” Nessa said. “Our noble fireteam leader is angry, but he’ll get over it.”

“I don’t blame him.” Callia’s ghost added. 

“He’ll be fine.” Nessa said. “I’m just glad that you’re back.”

“And I’m glad to see you.”

“What have they got you doing?”

“I’m confined to the tower for now. I’m not supposed to leave until Ikora decides what they’re going to do.”

“Do you think you’ll be assigned back to us?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well I hope that you are!” Nessa said. “We want you back!”

“Thank you.” Callia said, hesitantly continuing. “I’m sorry.”

“Just don’t leave again.” Nessa said. “Don’t do that and we’re good.”

“I don’t think I will for a while.” Callia said. “At least until Ikora decides. I think if I stop my research and agree not to continue I should be fine.”

“Your research?” Nessa asked. 

“On the hive. That--That was why I would stay behind, destroying whatever was left behind by the hive.”

“I always just assumed you were being thorough.” Nessa replied. 

“I lied.” Callia said, looking down. “I’m going to try to do better.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it! If you want, I’m planning to meet some other guardians for Ramen-- you’re welcome to come with us! It should be good for you to make some friends!”

“I think I want to sleep.” Callia replied. “I know I don’t need to, but I want to rest after everything.”

“Of course!” Nessa said, reaching out to hug Callia again. “I’ll let you do that.”

“Thank you.”

Callia stepped back from Nessa. 

“Goodbye!”

“Bye!”

Callia waved goodbye to Nessa, heading back to her room. When she’d returned, it’d been nearly as she’d left it, all of her meager belongings and spare armor still waiting for her, albeit rifled through in what she assumed must have been the search for her and where she’d went. 

The week since she’d returned had been quiet. She’d spoken with Ikora after returning, giving the other the datapad with all her notes, turning it over for the other to see. Ikora hadn’t seemed too terribly worried about what she showed her, and Callia had left out any details of the whispers that she’d heard in the silences since. 

They were largely silent here in the tower, and Callia was grateful for that. She still didn’t understand what had caused her to hear them, and she feared the moment that she would hear them again. They came in the quietest moments-- hints of something beyond, bringing with them that all too familiar chill of the darkness.

Her ghost had been more than willing to help, reminding her in quiet moments of the story of Toland the Shattered, telling her that she was lucky that she’d stopped when she had, before things had progressed to the point they had with him. 

It had to have been nearly a year since she’d first taken the first rune, and Callia could only imagine what would have happened if she’d continued her studies. 

The loss of her sense of self that would likely come if she continued, the whispers that she would hear, didn’t seem like the worst loss, but the chance of losing those she cared for, permanently-- or the chance that she’d harm them, like Dredgen Yor, had slowly begun to haunt her. 

Truly, Callia had no desire to sleep, but she wasn’t sure what else to do. Sleep would bring unwelcome dreams, and so, after only a moment of time in her room, Callia determined what she would do. She slipped off her helmet, setting it aside, and left again, purposefully avoiding the area with the Ramen shop. She’d find somewhere quiet to sit, and from there she’d wait and listen. 

* * *

Eventually, Callia found a spot on the roof of the tower, a cool breeze blowing as she sat, settling herself into the corner. There was no reason to be here at this time of night, so it was quiet, the murmur of voices distant, but still enough to prevent complete silence. 

“Ghost?”

“Yes?”

“Did I hurt you when I left?”

“Of course.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You should be.” Ghost retorted, still somewhat irritable. “I’m a creature of the traveler. I’m meant to be of the light. Do you have any idea what it’s like to be forced to watch someone you love turn away from that? Because they’re making a dumb choice?”

“I… don’t.” Callia said, regretting her question to her ghost. 

“Good. I hope that you never have to.” Her ghost said. “Callia, I hope you learned from this, and that you aren’t just going to do this all again the moment that you can.”

“I see what I did hurt others. I can see that what I did is something that goes against the rules.”

“And does that mean anything to you, Ms. ‘Rules were made to be broken’?”

“I suppose I can see that this rule was made for a reason. Besides, you’ve reminded me of TOland more than enough times to show me why it was.”

“Can you imagine what it must be like to be his ghost? Impossible! I can only imagine how frustrating it must have been. Never listening, falling for a deathsinger…” Her ghost continued in his rant, and Callia tried to think of a way that she could communicate to him that she did care, and to assuage her growing sense of guilt at what she’d put her ghost through.

“Ghost, why didn’t you ever choose a name?”

“... And Toland-- What?” 

“Why didn’t you ever choose a name?” Callia asked again. 

“Ghosts don’t typically choose their own names. Their Guardian will give them one.”

“Why don’t you choose?”

“I’ve never really thought about it.”

“I think you should.” Callia said. “It’s a good idea.”

“I’ll have to think about it.” The ghost said. “Callia, I’ll think about it and let you know.”

“That’s got to be a better thing to think about than telling me about Toland again.”

“Hmph. I have to remind you, Guardian, lest you do something stupid.”

“I won’t.” Callia said, standing. “Why don’t we walk and think of ideas?”

“...I suppose we could do that.”

* * *

Callia fought back a yawn as she returned to her room, ghost muttering names under his breath. 

“Why couldn’t you just come up with a name, like Nessa and Lux? Lux told me that Nessa named him after they met.”

“Lux is a good name.” Callia said. “But I don’t know what name I’d give you.”

“Maybe you ought to start thinking about it then!”

“I still think that you ought to decide.”

“And I still think that you need to choose for yourself.”

“Callia, look!” Her ghost hissed to her, edging close to her ear before zipping towards her door. “Commander! What brings you here!” 

Callia straightened up as she approached, seeing that Zavala was indeed standing outside her room, hand poised to knock on the door. 

“Ah. Guardian, Ghost.” He nodded to both of them. “Callia, I was hoping that I could speak with you.”

Callia yawned again. “Sorry-- But yes. We can talk. Mind if we go in? For privacy?”

“Of course.” The Commander nodded, and Callia keyed in the code, sliding into the small space, the Commander following after a moment of hesitation. 

“I’ve spoken with Ikora.” The Commander said. “About what you recorded.”

“What did she say?” Callia asked, meeting the Commander’s gaze. 

“I said that I’d deliver the news. You will be staying at the tower. You’ll be assigned to another fireteam that will report in to Ikora after missions on your actions.”

Callia slowly nodded, an uncomfortable silence settling in between them. 

Callia looked to her ghost, floating to the side, then back to Zavala. 

“I-- I’m sorry. For never responding to your messages.” 

Zavala looked away for a moment, then returned his gaze to Callia. 

“I care about you, I really do-- And Ghost explained to me what I did wrong, and I realize that I was stupid, and that I shouldn’t have done what I did.” Callia said, speaking quickly. “He’s been telling me stories of Toland, and he reminded me that there are others who care about me, and Nessa was upset, and the rest of my fireteam hasn’t even spoken with me since I returned.” 

Callia paused, beginning to pace. 

“I don’t want to lose myself. I heard things there, in that cave, and I want to know more, but I don’t want to lose what I am in the process, and based on history and what happened to every other guardian who studied the darkness, there’s no way to do that.” Callia’s words hitched, and she stopped, resting her head against the door. 

“I heard whispers, Zavala, things that I didn’t understand.”

“Callia--” He said, moving to gently turn her to face him, placing his hands on her shoulders. “Guardian. You are the one who controls your fate. If you truly turn from that, then you can be sure of your path.”

Callia looked into his eyes, unsure and hesitant. 

“I’m so sorry. I was afraid when you came-- I thought you’d never speak to me again, after what I did.”

“Callia, what matters is that you change your path. So long as you do that--” He broke off. “I did not want to lose you. To the hive, to the darkness. I cannot risk that.”

“I didn’t want to lose you.” Callia said.

“You didn’t-- but things will have to be different now.”

“I accept that.”

“I cannot carry on a relationship with someone entrenched in the hive.” Zavala said. “I learned from Ikora what you knew, and if you truly do intend to change, then we can talk.

Callia nodded slowly, stepping away carefully. 

“I understand.”

“I do care.” Zavala said. “Do not mistake that. But I believe that what we need is time.”

“That’s...understandable.” Callia said, nodding. “Should we set a time to talk again?”

“A month.”

“A month, then.” Callia nodded.

Zavala nodded back, turning and exiting. 

“Well, that could have gone worse.” Her ghost said. 

* * *

“Ghost, any messages?” Callia asked from where she was crouched in cover. 

“Nothing. What about Prospero?”

Callia took aim at the fallen captain, letting off a shot with her sniper. 

“I don’t like it. If you do, go with it, but I don’t think it fits.”

“What about Galen?” Rust-5, the Exo titan that Callia’d been assigned to the fireteam of called  over to her as she punched a Vandal.

“Hey!” Galen Simril, hunter,  called back easily. “Your ghost can’t steal my name, Callia. ”

“I’ll know when I find it.” The Ghost said. “I just haven’t found one that fits.”

“It’s got to have been about a month, hasn’t it?” Rust asked. “That’s how long you’ve been with us, Callia.”

“You’d think that we’d’ve cleared the EDZ of the Fallen by now,” Callia replied. 

“There’s always more.” Rust said, punching a dreg, sending it flying. “If I’ve learned anything here, it’s that there’s always more Fallen to fight.”

“Callia, message!” Her Ghost called. 

“From who?” Rust asked as Galen fired.

“From--” 

“Shh, ghost! None of your business, Rust!”

“I’m the fireteam leader! Of course it’s my business!”

Galen pushed at Rust, nudging her to the side. “C’mon, let her be.”

“I’m just asking!”

“It’s from Him, Callia!” Her ghost whispered, bobbing close to her ear. “He wants to talk.”

Callia was pretty sure that if she’d had a physical heart, she would’ve just felt it leap. As it was, she looked to Rust as she fired her hand cannon at the last of the dreg, calling over to her. 

“Rust, when are we going back to the city?”

“Not for another couple of days. We’ve got duty here till the next fireteam heads out.” Rust walked over, Galen following easily. “Why, you need to head back early?”

“Just wondering.”  Callia said.

“Well, don’t worry. We’ll be back soon, and in the meantime Galen and I will go check in with Devrim. You go answer that message!”

Callia nodded, and as her fireteam walked away, she turned to her ghost. 

“Well?”

“What about Abner?”

“Ghost, the message!” Callia said, nudging the little robot. 

“Fine, fine. Passing it along to you.”

“Guardian-- Callia. When you return to the tower, I would ah-- like it if you would contact me.”

“Ghost, did you hear that?” 

“Of course I did!”

Callia moved ahead, following her fireteam. 

“Ghost, it’ll be just a few more days here, and then--.”

“I know, I know! Now, back to me! What about Alexander?” 

* * *

“Alright, this is a good one, Callia. What about Alec? It’s smaller, but I think I like it.”

“Ghost, if you like it, then I like it.” Callia replied, twitching her foot as her ship approached the tower. 

“Ready for transmat?” 

“Ready.”

As she landed, Callia spoke. “Ghost, will you send a message to--?”

“Already on it. Sending a message to the Commander that you’re back on the tower, aaand done.” 

“Ugh-- I need to go clean my armor before we do anything else.” Callia said.

“A month camping will do that.” Her ghost replied. “Any engrams to bring to the cryptarch?”

“I’ll deal with that later.” Callia said. “I want to get cleaned up first.”

“What about Jem?”

“Again, small. I think it could work.”

“I like it too.” Her ghost mused. “Maybe.”

“Now. Armor, then food?” 

“Sounds good to me, Guardian.”

Callia took a few steps in the direction of her room. 

“Message for you. The Commander would like to meet with you later tonight.”

“Good.” Callia said, pausing for a moment. “Where?” 

“His quarters. Not yours, for once.”

“Fancy.” Callia remarked. 

“You two did have a bad habit of meeting in awkward places before.” 

“We made do.” Callia said. 

“You really did.” Her ghost said. “And I’d end up getting stuck with keeping watch.”

“I didn’t need you there!” Callia said. 

“You know you need me.”

“I do, I do!” Callia replied. “And I’m glad that you’ve stuck with me through it all.”

“I’m your ghost. That’s what I do. Someone’s got to keep you from doing something stupid.”

Given their past, that stung a little, but it was something Callia knew that she deserved at this point. She would do better though, and she would prove that with time. 

* * *

Callia shifted her weight from foot to foot, nervous about the upcoming conversation. She’d changed out of her armor, thoroughly cleaning herself of whatever grime remained from the EDZ. After some debate, she’d decided to go out of armor,  digging out a set of civilians clothes that she hadn’t worn in some time. Guardians lived in their armor, day in and day out, and it was strange to step out of her room in them.

It was dark out as she walked, the tower still lit. There were fewer guardians out and about where she was going, farther away from the guardians out for a evening of drinking and eating. 

“What about Magnus?”

“Too fancy.” Callia said. “Doesn’t feel like you.”

“It was worth a shot.”

“I liked Alec.” Callia remarked. 

“I’ll think about it.” Her ghost said, falling silent as they walked. 

Finally, they reached the room Callia knew to be Zavala’s, knocking carefully on the door. 

It was a moment before it opened, and when it did, Callia was relieved to see that Zavala wasn’t in his armor, wearing simple clothes, and truly, it was as impressive as he’d said nearly a year ago. In this moment, Callia was glad that she was an Exo because she wouldn’t be blushing at the very least.

“Commander.”

“Guardian.” Zavala’s voice was cautious, but warm. “Come in.”

Callia stepped into his room, followed by her ghost. There was certainly more room here than in her rooms, and she supposed that being the Vanguard Commander must have some perks. The room was sparsely decorated, a table with a datapad in the corner, two chairs pulled up to it.

“Callia.” He said as the door closed, reaching to pull her into his embrace. 

They broke apart after a moment, and he gestured towards the chair. “If you’d take a seat.”

Callia sat, her ghost following after her for a moment before disappearing. Callia didn’t doubt that he’d stay close, but for now she was grateful for the privacy. Zavala’s ghost was absent as well. 

“Well?” Callia asked. 

“Ikora has kept me updated on your work with your fireteam.”

“They’ve been good. Different, but good.”

An awkward silence fell between them. 

“...Do you still hear the whispers?”

“Not since those first days.” Callia admitted. She missed them, to a degree, but that was something that she’d never admit to him. She had decided where she stood-- more importantly, who she stood with-- and she wasn’t going to go back on that.

“That is good.”

“It is.” Callia said, and for a moment she missed the days before she’d left, when it’d been so easy to keep up a conversation, asking questions about everything and anything, Zavala teaching her about the things that he remembered from the past, events he’d been alive for that Callia didn’t remember. Those stolen moments, hidden away late at night or in moments when she returned from strikes had been a highlight of her time. 

Zavala hesitantly reached for her hand, taking it in his. 

“Callia, we both have responsibilities. I won’t say that I’ll always be able to be there for you, because the city comes first.”

“I understand that.” Callia replied. “I understood it before too.”

“Good. I still want what I wanted before. Do-- Ah-- Do you?”

“I do.” Callia said. 

“We’ll still need to be discreet.” Zavala reached his free hand up, brushing it across her cheek.

“I understand.” Callia said, sure that if she had breath she’d be somewhat breathless right now. 

Zavala learned forwards and slowly, for the first time since before she’d  left, kissed Callia, their lips meeting slowly, hesitant at first, then more insistent. Callia reached across with her free hand, grasping his shirt with it.

“Are we going to tell anyone?” Callia said as they broke apart. 

“I would rather if we didn’t for now.” Zavala said, breathing heavily. 

“I can understand that.” Callia said. “We’ll be at the tower for about a month, then we’re heading back to the EDZ again.”

“We will take what time we can.” Zavala replied. “We are guardians foremost, and anything else comes after.” 


End file.
